Hear me out! When you see or hear the word “crone,” what is the first thing that comes to your mind? Do you see a shriveled-up, stringy-gray-haired, toothless woman, curled over and limping along as her arthritic hands clench her gnarly cane? Like how a witch is portrayed in cartoons, movies and children’s (!) story books?
I’m not surprised. It’s simply another example of social programming that portrays women over a certain age as ugly, decrepit and frightening.
But indigenous cultures around the world acknowledge that, as years pass, we have valuable insights to share.
In some of these cultures, a woman becomes a crone when she reaches the age of 50. Other definitions suggest that menopause ushers in the crone era. Still others suggest that becoming a grandmother is the only requirement. Nowadays, with our longer lifespans, women can spend decades in crone energy. And that’s a good thing.
Whether or not you like the word, if you’re still reading this post, you likely have noticed a shift in how you are perceived in the world. One of the first indications of crone is that you become invisible to strangers. You can walk down a crowded street and people bump into you like you’re not there. People speak over you in conversations. No one sees you. Not the opposite sex and not even young women seem to take notice anymore.
When it first starts to happen, it’s like a gut punch for many women. It often is a trigger for what’s known in pop psychology as an identity crisis. Who am I if I’m not young and desirable?
Women in the west have been raised to believe that our looks are the most important contribution we make to society. And that it is our responsibility to maintain the appearance of being 27 when we are double and triple that age. In other words, our aging is a social failure.
With time, however, women can learn to use their invisibility as a superpower. We can learn how to turn it off and turn it on. We “show up” when we want to. We observe quietly when that suits us.
And at the same time that we make peace with our invisibility, we notice other shifts as well. Our gaze shifts inward, and we come to question our next contribution: Why am I still here? What else can I do to make a difference in the world? What is my next purpose?
And the blessing of no longer being so engaged in what other people about think about our looks or what we’re doing, no longer chasing after young children or exhausting ourselves with establishing a career, we have the space to nurture our own personal and spiritual path.
We often notice new perspectives developing. We hunger for deeper understanding of ourselves as part of the tapestry of life. Because life is a tapestry: how you connect with nature, with other people, and with infinite possibilities.
And each individual life is its own tapestry: Crone is not just older woman. Crone is a combination of everything she has been before, Crone is maiden, mother, and crone. She is everything she has ever been and all that she will still become.
And crone knows it is her responsibility to share her wisdom and experiences with the world. We see this in mythology, in indigenous cultures where the matriarch is honored and revered, and even in modern developmental psychology that outlines the stages of life: Once a woman hits crone status, she has a powerful urge to share her well-earned wisdom to nurture and mentor those who follow.
Like the word. Don’t like the word. But one thing is certain: It is a blessing to reach crone status. Period.
Come back for more in this series about the empowered crone!
Sending you love,
Lisa
PS if you’d like guidance tapping into your own powerful wisdom and soul purpose, reach out here to learn about the all-new one-on-one Women’s Wisdom Wheel mentorship and energy healing program, guided by the medicine wheel and lots of crone energy!