No. No. No **Unpopular opinion alert.**

This post stopped my scroll. All love to the original poster, but I respectfully disagree. The concept that “we can’t pour from an empty vessel” permeates our culture, and I think it does women a disservice.

Hear me out, because I literally have a PhD in women’s self-care. (Well, technically my dissertation was on women’s self-care!) but I’m also a woman who is closer to crone than maiden on life’s journey so I’ve learned a few things. And when I tune in to the quiet voice that guides me, it’s clear that three aspects of myself (professional, personal & spiritual) agree:

Self-care is for You. It’s inherent in the name of it. You don’t do self-care for the benefit of everyone else! Then it would be called “everyone else-care”!

When you care for yourself, you feel better. Your health improves. Your peace lightens you. Your mind slows. Your self-critical voice becomes quiet. Your optimism returns. Your imagination catches fire. You become the version of you that you enjoy most.

Are you nicer to other people are people after self-care? Probably. Do you feel revitalized and better able to manage everyone else’s needs? Very likely. But the common denominator in all these scenarios is You. Your Self.

The idea that self-care allows you to do more for others is simply more social programming nonsense designed to make you feel self-ish (see?) so you don’t actually do it. Or if you do it, you have to justify it or feel guilty about it, which ultimately unravels any benefits you might have received from doing it.

Because if you take care of yourself for no other reason than your own pleasure, growth and well-being… well, you’re on a slippery slope to self love, aren’t you?

And people who love themselves tend to look inward when making decisions about their lives. We tend to question the status quo and the social messaging that keeps so many people trapped in the rat race.

Women who are healthy, optimistic and at peace tend to be able to hear the soul stirrings urging them on to create a more expensive and fulfilling life. That’s great for you. Not great for this system that relies on cogs in wheels to keep running.

Make the shift to engaging in self-care for You and watch what happens.

Sending you love,


PS Ready for some life-expanding self-care? Check out the Embodied Purpose 90 day body, mind & soul activation and amplification program. Go here to learn more.

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